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The Resplendent World of the Sea

           BY AYUSH DAS Ė Age 11

One day as I was watching the wave on its way to the shore,
I saw a shell, a beautiful shell.
In the shallow water I bent,
Suddenly a wave swept me away:
And here I was able to see the wonderful world
Which everyone longed to see.
I  saw the home of wonderful shells,
Some big, some small and some colorful.
I viewed some of the most beautiful creatures
And all went in a beautiful rhythm,
Very disciplined I must say.
I swam with a dolphin and explored this world
It had mysteries of tales from far and near:
I saw the little mermaids swim all about,
What a scene it was,
And I still remember it now.
It is time for me to go
But I will soon return to write more.
 

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Reviews:

Superb...... Keep it up!                                                   -  George T.  10/5/05

It is a good poem.                                                           - Ayush S  1/13/06

The poet is very good in writing poems as is proved by this poem.

-  Aditya Banka  1/19/06

Dasís poem is quite well-written. But even while using blank verse, to maintain a certain amount of rhythm would make poetry more effective. Das should read poems written by poets of the English Romantic and Victorian Age for better grounding.                                                                                                                                                                                   -  Vishakha   2/26/06

Very imaginative, Ayush. I love your poem. I took that journey with you.

-  Yvonne Branch   9/18/08

Dear Ayush, your poem is a good one for a person who's 11 but I'm sure you can do better, so try to write more. You can also read older poems.

-  Mahsa 12/15/08

At your age this poem is great. I go to the beach every week so I share your experience. Continue to write.                                                                                                                                                   - Yvonne Branch  1/22/09

 

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